


sweet pea, keeper of my soul

by peterneds



Series: july fic challenge [3]
Category: Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017)
Genre: Autistic Peter Parker, Banter, Fluff, Gay Ned Leeds, M/M, Slice of Life, being straddled is literally a stim u can't convince me otherwise, meme fuckers, ned has a good mother in this bc i love him, peter adopts cats for a few days when he finds them out on patrol
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-10
Updated: 2018-07-10
Packaged: 2019-06-08 01:57:35
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,322
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15232857
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/peterneds/pseuds/peterneds
Summary: Peter gets this shit eating grin on his face and Ned has already buried his head into his hands.“Would you say,” he pauses, and then, “my fuckin’ pussies?” and breaks out into a fit of giggles.Ned, voice muffled, says, “I’m breaking up with you, give me back the ring, we’re done, you are the absolute worst, you know that? You ignored what I had to say to make a joke like you’re fucking 12 years old again, and you didn’t even make jokes like that at 12 years old, Peter!”/title from 'sweet pea' by amos lee





	sweet pea, keeper of my soul

“Hey, honey…. Did you seriously adopt another kitten?” 

Peter is hanging upside down from his ceiling and a chocolate chip cookie (homemade by Ned’s own mother) is halfway to his mouth when he drops it in favour of looking over at his boyfriend. 

He spins a bit, so he’s facing Ned directly, looks him in the eyes and says, “I have absolutely no idea what you’re speaking of.” 

Ned takes the cookie from his hands and Peter lets out a little “hey!” before Ned rolls his eyes, breaks a piece of the cookie off, and plops it down in Peter’s open mouth. 

“My mom said to give you _some,_ she didn’t specify how many. Anyway, onto more pressing matters: your fuckin’ cats, Peter.” 

Peter gets this shit eating grin on his face and Ned has already buried his head into his hands. 

“Would you say,” he pauses, and then, “my fuckin’ pussies?” and breaks out into a fit of giggles.

Ned, voice muffled, says, “I’m breaking up with you, give me back the ring, we’re done, you are the absolute _worst,_ you know that? You ignored what I had to say to make a joke like you’re fucking 12 years old again, and you didn’t even _make_ jokes like that at 12 years old, Peter!” 

“Hey,” Peter pouts uselessly, because he knows he is the worst but that doesn’t mean he’s got to hear it from this weird kid who always follows him around. (Ned would quite literally have him in a chokehold if he knew that’s how Peter referred to him in his head.) 

Ned shakes his head, “no, you’re not doing that thing again cause you know it’s not fair and you know it’ll always work and I’m only further proving your point, I’m giving you _leverage,_ shit,” he says, and knee walks over to where he can reach Peter because he knows what’s coming, knows the card Peter’s about to pull, like the little shit always does. 

He pouts his lips out even more, makes grabby hands in Ned’s direction, and whines out in the softest voice, “gimme kiss?” 

And Ned, hopelessly, _stupidly_ in love, does. 

It’s the stupidest thing, kissing like this, you see. Because Peter’s hand on Ned’s cheek is quite literally upside down and it’s all Ned can do to keep from tugging Peter down and onto the floor because he had a headache for two days from the impact on his head last time Ned tried. 

“Okay,” Ned says, breathless, pulling back to try and speak to Peter, but chases Ned's lips and pecks him twice more, and Ned physically moves back so he can speak. 

“Absolutely unfair,” Peter says, and his cheeks have gone a little rosy from the lack of oxygen and Ned just has all the love in the world for the boy in front of him, the boy who hangs from the ceiling instead of sitting on the floor like a fucking normal person because he likes how it feels. The boy who’s a little too reckless for his own good but only because he cares so much. The boy who’s got his whole heart. 

“Completely and totally fair,” Ned counters, instead, because they’ve got better things to discuss than Ned’s love for Peter. 

Peter huffs and detaches himself from the ceiling to walk over to Ned and take his hand, traces the lines in his palm for a couple seconds before looking up at Ned and saying, straight-faced, “so, about my fuckin’ pussies?” 

Ned stares at him for a solid thirty seconds before Peter’s just giggling his little ass off, and he falls back onto the floor with it and splays his limbs out like a starfish as the last of his fit escapes his body, chest heaving occasionally with his huffs of laughter. 

Ned moves until he’s sitting on top of Peter, legs on either side of his waist, and bends so their faces are only a few inches apart and whispers, “you’ve gotta stop bringing the pussies home.” 

And Peter tries, he really does, but he just can’t contain his laughter. 

Ned sighs from above him and says, “if that’s the only way you’re gonna talk about it that’s how we’re doing it, baby. So, the pussies.” 

Peter takes Ned’s face in his hands and rubs his thumbs absentmindedly across his cheekbones. “My cats, sweet pea, I’m sorry, my kittens, I know.” 

Ned shakes his head and turns it so he can press a kiss to the center of Peter’s palm, whispers, “the worst,” into the skin there, before clasping Peter’s hands in his own and bringing their entwined fingers to rest on top of Peter’s rib cage. 

“So, why are you bringing them home instead of straight to the shelter?”

“The local shelter here sucks, Ned,” and his thumb is rubbing soothinly back and forth across the back of Ned’s hand and Ned doesn’t even think he _realises_ he’s doing it and it’s. It’s all a bit much, today, because for some reason he’s gone a little breathless from all the fondness he has for the stupid boy beneath him.

“Okay,” he says, and Peter knows the wheels in his head are turning. “So why not just take them to a better one upstate, when you go see Mr. Stark next?” 

“But -” Peter says, fully ready to argue his own point, but his features fade into a look of surprise. “Huh. That’s actually a good idea.” 

Ned grins down at him, moving to return back to his space on the floor where he had his back pressed against Peter’s bottom bunk.

“See, this is why you need me,” Ned says, a bit too loud, and Peter brings his hands down to try to cover his ears discreetly.

“Yeah, plus you kiss me and stuff. And you have all my uwus, so we’re practically stuck together for the rest of our lives,” Peter says, bringing his hands back up to splay over Ned’s thighs, tightening his grip a little bit and he pouts a bit as he says, “hey, could you maybe stay here for a little bit?” 

Ned raises his eyebrows and looks down at him.

“Not like _that,_ oh my god, you fucker!” He exclaims, nearly pushing Ned off of him but Ned’s quicker than he is, has his hands wrapped around Peter’s wrists before his hands ever reached Ned.

“It’s just,” Peter huffs. “The pressure of you on top of me is nice, you know?”

“Aw, baby,” Ned coos, and Peter rolls his eyes, so Ned pokes his cheek. “You’re using me to stim.”

“Only thing you’re good for,” he says under his breath and Ned pokes his cheek, more threateningly this time.

“I’m cool with you using me to stim, but my back hurts a little bit from slouching over you.” 

Peter takes Ned’s hands again and tugs him down so he’s laying directly on top of Peter, and he lets out a surprised little huff because he was not expecting to be man handled like that. 

“This works,” Ned says, and his little exhales of breath tickle Peter’s neck, and the little shit has the nerve to drop two chaste kisses onto the column of Peter’s neck. 

“Mm,” Peter hums and lets a hand fall into Ned’s hair. “Could you do me a favour and be a little bit less loud, if you don’t mind?” 

Ned buries his face into Peter’s shoulder. “Are your ears bothering you again?” he says, voice muffled.

“S’just sensory overload, sweet pea, promise.” 

“M’kay,” Ned says, voice gone a bit too soft and Peter’s hands are ghosting up and down Ned’s back soothingly, and he says, “I think we sleep now.” 

“Yeah,” Peter laughs softly, presses a kiss to Ned’s hair. 

“When we wake up we’re going upstate though, okay?” 

“Yes,” Peter says, firmly, and then: “to get rid of my fuckin’ pussies.” 

Ned rolls off of him.

**Author's Note:**

> third fic of fedj i missed two days i missed yesterday's bc i had a breakdown over losing text and the day before's bc i had a depressive episode leave a comment for my suffering 
> 
> also ok so spoiler alert the last edition of the 'memories i keep close' 'verse was gonna be the end of iw but i fucked up so should i just add this and a kid afraid of the dark to that series since they exist in the same universe/canon????? idk lemme know i need opinions 
> 
> tumblr is @hcllnd thanks for validating me again today


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